You may have heard of comfort zones (a situation where you feel comfortable and confident), but what you may not have heard is how expanding it in one direction has benefits in that it also expands it in others directions – to start to feel more comfortable doing other things that perhaps perviously would have caused you concern. I’m going out of mine big time at the moment, and it’s not that bad (honestly!) – don’t get me wrong, I sometimes get butterflies as I do things I’ve never done before, regardless of if I gingerly tip-toe out of my comfort zone, leap or are pushed off the cliff. I guess the difference is that I have my NLP skills which mean I know how to get around or calm the little butterflies, I can rationalise or ‘re-frame’ what’s going/the feelings I’m experiencing and this all means that I’m rarely stopped stepping out of my comfort zone these days. As the saying goes: the magic happens outside of your comfort zone! (whilst your comfort zone might be a safe and cozy haven for you, it get’s a bit boring really, doesn’t it?! – before you go running for your comfort zone take a read below …)
Some of you will know that many moons ago now, I spent 34 days on an NLP course for my own development – the biggest investment I’ve ever made in my professional and personal development – it was amazing, I learn’t so much. However the lead trainer started the course by saying “get used to being out of your comfort zone, because your going to spend a lot of time there!” – whilst I my mind raced, I and the other delegates started to turn to each other in the audience, I wondered how awful it might be, what was he going to do to us. Thankfully moments later my previous NLP training kicked in; I considered the possibilities of what I might learn and that this was all about learning new things. I was able to re-frame it in my mind – the thing is, success and development can feel a bit hard and uncomfortable at times as we tread territory which is unknown.
In NLP reframing becomes a technique that we use often. It’s something you may well do unconsciously already; the art is being able to learn how to use it consciously when you know it’s helpful for you or the person you are coaching or talking to. Officially, Reframing is ‘the process of changing the context or content of a statement to give it a new meaning’. Great coaches are masters of reframing – taking a client who is stuck and getting them to see new possibilities, new choices so they can ‘see the wood for the trees’. The meaning of any event depends on the way (the frame) that we use to view it, understand it.
Try this, consider a normal dice in the middle of a square table with a person sat at each side of the table – all 4 of them view the dice (aka the event, problem etc) however they have a different view (or take) on the dice (or problem). Try another example – you can change the meaning by recovering more information – e.g. if you were looking at a small 1 cm square of brown in the bottom corner of the Mona Lisa, you’d have a very different view of the painting than if you could see the whole thing, right?
So, if you can increase your confidence to get out there and do one thing (however small) you’ll find your confidence to do other things increases also 🙂
Do something that takes you out of your comfort zone and see what happens!
Laura is passionate about helping people realise their potential, and achieve the results they deserve. She believes, if you change your thinking, you can change your results. If you’d like to find out more about Unleash Your Potential, you can check out our NLP courses and coaching options, and link up with us via our Facebook page, follow us on Twitter or link up with Laura via LinkedIn. You can of course also email us at: firstname.lastname@example.org